Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Does saving bees make up for waterboarding a stray cat?


Okay, I'll stop with the screaming, but this is exciting. "Did her lawn need mowing that badly?" you're asking. Well, it needed it pretty badly, to be sure, but the primary reason for the excitement is that I finally felt physically able to accomplish the task. I kept my cellphone in my pocket, in case a sudden back spasm landed me in the middle of the yard with the mower on top of me, but I didn't need it. Lawns mowed: one. Back spasms: none. Feeling of accomplishment after weeks and weeks of feeling like a decrepit old thing: priceless.

I have a couple of patches of clover in my backyard, and as I mowed down the bigger one, I thought about the fact that I only saw one bee last year, and hadn't seen any this year. (So sad, the plight of the humble honeybee.) A few minutes later, as I aimed the instrument of destruction at the second patch of clover, I saw him. A bee! Sipping clover nectar for all he was worth. I managed to take evasive action in time to not mow him down, and decided to leave the clover patch unmowed. When I went back to look later, he had been joined by a couple of friends. Yay, bees! Drinks are on me.

Hopefully my care and feeding of the bees will negate any negative karmic points I accrued last week with the near drowning of the poor stray kitty.

On the economic stimulus front, I spent two hours in the mall last Friday and left empty-handed. There was not one thing in the WHOLE MALL I wanted to purchase. (Who decided that all women want to look like they're pregnant while wearing pastel colors? Where are the clothes that don't make me look like I'm trying to hide something? Though, speaking of hiding--where are the clothes that don't completely expose my somewhat flabby upper arms? Where are the jewel tones? Speaking of jeweled--I already have sparkly flip-flops--isn't there any other shoe being sold?) So disappointing. Saturday I made a trip to the bookstore (I have never in my life voluntarily left a bookstore empty-handed), and the big box mart, where I stocked up on exciting items like an aerator for my bathroom faucet and a snake-y thing to unclog my bathroom drain. I ended up spending quite a chunk of change on boring...stuff, so the economy may consider itself stimulated. Me, not so much. Gah. I did send off my official application for membership to "Nensa," so I guess that will count as my splurge. My life--it continues to be a constant source of joy and wonder. Sigh.

But hey--at least I'm no longer in physical pain. Look at me--all optimistic and shit.


Sauntering Soul said...

So here's where we are very, very different: when you get excited about mowing the lawn it's because your back is better (yippee for that!). If I ever express excitement over mowing my lawn it will be because I've never done it before. That's right. I'll be 40 in 3 months and I've never mowed grass. That's what brothers and landlords have been for all these years.

But I'm so happy to hear your back is better and that you are saving the lives of bees (since I eat honey every single morning)!

And if I went to the mall I'm sure I'd leave empty handed too but it would be because I can never find anything to fit my chubby butt in.

-R- said...

After rabbits ate our plants, I am now anti-any animal that tries to get in our yard. So you have full authority from me to mow down a bee if you want.

3carnations said...

Way to be optimistic. :)

I think we've completed our economy stimulating. I may stimulate OUR economy by having a small, short garage sale soon.

nancypearlwannabe said...

I am still in awe that you are (will be) a card-carrying member of Nensa. I am going to tell everybody that I know a genius! A genius who ALREADY OWNS sparkly flip flops!

Stefanie said...

I was just excited because I was able to get my mower started. We all have our own small lawn-related victories. :-)

As for the bees, I know we're all supposed to be up in arms because if the bees are gone, it will disrupt everything else, but I can't help thinking no bees is not a bad thing.

gorillabuns said...

I quite glad you were pain-free but pissed we don't have our economic stimulus package. I'm beginning to believe we aren't receiving one.

L Sass said...

Congratulations on the lawn mowing!

But boo on the unsuccessful shopping trip. I'm not big on the pastels, either.

Stinkypaw said...

Congrats on being pain free, on sending in your application and on saving a bee! You rock, on top of being smart and wearing bling on your flip flops!

don't call me MA'AM said...

Allergies prevent me from ever mowing the lawn. Yes. I am a card-carrying wuss who is allergic to grass. Pathetic, I know. I therefore am in awe of everyone who does. So, I bow down before you!

And remind me never to piss you off. I don't want to end up in a icy, soggy death trap. ;-)

Noelle said...

I'm glad you're feeling better! I had the same problem at the mall. When oh when will clothes ever be made for my type? Grrrr.

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